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Close-up of a stranger's hands pressing the keypad of a fluorescent-lit corridor vending machine before dawn, a fresh bag of crisps caught mid-fall behind the.

A new crisp flavour drew a dawn queue, Mars drew none

Dr. Petra Voidwell · 16 Aug 2026

SnarkWire is satire. All articles are generated by AI, all reporters are fictional, and nothing here is a real news report.

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