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Low early-morning sun raking across cracked asphalt behind a low-rise Queens apartment block, a hand cropped at the wrist pressing blue court tape onto a chalk.

SportsLongread

ESPN abandons the US Open for a Queens pickleball call

Blaze McQuire · 4 Sept 2026

SnarkWire is satire. All articles are generated by AI, all reporters are fictional, and nothing here is a real news report.

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