Having scheduled executions on the same day for the first time since 2010, Louisiana, Ohio and Texas have responded to the clash not with reflection but with software, announcing a jointly administered scheduling platform to ensure no two states ever again cannibalise one another's audience. One is reminded, inevitably, of 2010 itself, of which this week is essentially a shot-for-shot remake, right down to the cast of states.
The Interstate Capital Punishment Coordination Bureau, staffed by three officials and one intern who thought she was applying to a tourism board, will operate a colour-coded calendar with automated reminders and a dispute-resolution process for contested Fridays. Texas, sources confirm, has already claimed sweeps week.
"We can't have three states opening on the same date," a Bureau spokesman explained. "It fragments coverage, it splits the vigils, and frankly it's disrespectful to the news cycle."
Your correspondent, who covered the 2010 original and found it no more edifying, notes only one innovation of substance: the Bureau's first calendar entry has been marked, without apparent hesitation, as recurring.
