Emma Raducanu is reading Andre Agassi's autobiography, and one branch library's hold queue for the book has become a blood feud.
Emma Raducanu is drawing inspiration from Andre Agassi's autobiography on her comeback. At one branch library, fourteen people now hold a seeded, televised feud over its only copy. A disputed return through the book slot has gone to appeal.
The returns slot at Upper Dunmore Community Library was taped shut on Monday. A hardback copy of Andre Agassi's 2009 autobiography, Open, had gone through it at an angle the branch manager called "the line call of my career."
The trouble began when word spread that Emma Raducanu is using the book for inspiration as she plots her route back to the top of tennis. Within hours, fourteen patrons had placed holds on the branch's only copy.
Raducanu's comeback is, by the standards of this desk, a quiet story. A former US Open champion is reading a memoir. The BBC reports that she has taken Agassi's advice to "be comfortable in your own identity." Athletes read books. Next question.
The hold queue is another matter entirely. Branch manager Delphine Aske seeded all fourteen names at opening time, ranked by unpaid overdue fines. She called it "the last fair system left in this country."
"The top seed has zero fines and a canvas tote," Aske said. "The fourteenth seed owes us for a DVD of Speed 2. He knows what he did."
Then came the flashpoint. The second seed finished the book early and pushed it through the slot spine first. The top seed, waiting by the desk, claimed it clipped the metal frame and should be ruled out. Out of what, nobody could say. The rule was invented on the spot and adopted by acclamation.
Aske called for review. Two volunteers took up positions on folding stools beside the returns bin as line judges. A borrowed doorbell camera, angled at the slot, served as the replay system. The footage showed a blur, a thud and part of a thumb.
"I've judged the crossword corner for years," said volunteer Rodney Pell. "I have never seen a spine behave like that. It kicked. It had topspin on it."
Marguerite Hollins, chair of the Friends of the Library, called the standoff the most disciplined display of pettiness the building has ever hosted. "Agassi wrote a whole book about hating tennis," she said. "We have grown adults hating each other over one hardback. That is the kind of commitment you cannot coach."
The book now sits in the bin under a folded tea towel. Staff are forbidden to touch it until an appeals panel meets next Monday. The panel is the same fourteen people, plus a man who came in to use the printer.
Asked whether Raducanu herself could borrow the copy, Aske did not hesitate. "She's welcome to join the queue," she said. "Fifteenth seed. We honour the draw."
