NASA Files Formal Complaint Against Sun Over Swift Telescope Reentry
The agency says solar activity destroyed a satellite that was only supposed to last two years, and it wants the sun held accountable.
A fourteen-page invoice arrived on the desk of the sun on Sunday, according to NASA's orbital accounting office. The agency is seeking compensation for the loss of the Swift Observatory, which burned up near Indonesia after 22 years in orbit. The sun has not responded.
NASA spokesperson Dr. Patricia Henson said the complaint was a long time coming. "The sun has been damaging our hardware for decades," she said. "We finally have the paperwork to prove it."
The Swift telescope launched in 2004 on a planned two-year mission. It lasted more than ten times that long, so NASA's argument is not that the sun ended its life early. The agency says the sun's solar storms knocked it out of a stable orbit and forced a crash that scattered debris across the Pacific.
"It's not about the lifespan," Henson said. "It's about the manner of death. The sun didn't even give us a chance to say goodbye."
The complaint cites fourteen separate solar storms over the past few years. Each one, NASA says, "aggressively expanded the atmosphere" and dragged the telescope lower. The agency has asked the sun to cover the cost of a replacement, plus emotional damages.
An Act of God, Filed in Triplicate
The sun's legal team, if it has one, has not issued a response. A NASA intern assigned to monitor solar output for a reply reported no change in activity. "It's just sitting there, fusing hydrogen, ignoring us," the intern said.
Meanwhile, the agency is already preparing a similar case for the Hubble Space Telescope, which is expected to fall by the mid-2030s. "Hubble is our most valuable asset," Henson said. "We are not letting the sun take it without a fight."
NASA has asked private companies to pitch rescue missions for Hubble. But the orbital accounting office says a lawsuit against a star is "the cheaper option."
One complication: the sun is not a legal entity. NASA's general counsel has suggested naming the entire solar system as a co-defendant. "That way, if the sun doesn't show up, Jupiter has to answer," Henson said.
As of press time, the sun had not acknowledged receipt of the invoice. NASA said it would follow up with a second notice, this one printed on heat-resistant paper.
