A Los Angeles group that has tapped impatiently since Tom Holland announced his Fred Astaire film has put its feet down for the first time.
A Los Angeles group that has tapped its feet impatiently since Tom Holland announced his Fred Astaire biopic stopped when Margaret Qualley and Sabrina Carpenter joined the cast. Five years of waiting accidentally turned its members into expert tap dancers. They have now voted to keep going until the premiere.
Twenty-six people who have tapped one foot without stopping since Tom Holland announced his Fred Astaire biopic went still on Tuesday. The cause was news, first reported by Deadline, that Margaret Qualley and Sabrina Carpenter have joined the cast.
Sources close to the situation call the silence deafening. They also call it unprecedented and, above all, a relief for the downstairs neighbours.
Qualley will play Adele Astaire, Fred's sister and his first dance partner. Holland plays Fred. The nature of Carpenter's role is something this column is not yet emotionally ready to discuss.
Five years, one foot
The group calls itself the Impatient Foot Society. It formed in a Glendale church hall shortly after Holland first revealed the project, nearly five years ago.
Its founding pledge was simple. Members would tap until something happened. They assumed something would happen in a few weeks.
"We thought it would be like a coffee order," said founder Dolores Brisk. "You tap, you wait, they call your name. Nobody told us it would be like a mortgage."
The society met every week. Membership never grew past twenty-six, because every new applicant had to show they could tap through an entire awards season without blinking.
Then something nobody planned for happened around the second year. Tapping a foot for twelve hours a day, it turns out, is also called practice.
"By year three we had a shuffle-ball-change you could set a watch by," said Leonard Pike, the society's rhythm secretary. "By year four we were getting booked for bar mitzvahs. We didn't want this. We wanted a trailer."
Insiders say the group now holds the unofficial title of most accomplished tap ensemble in Los Angeles County. None of its members has ever taken a lesson. Several have openly wept at their own footwork, and one has had to buy new soles every few months.
The news broke on a Tuesday
Brisk heard the casting news mid-tap, while reading the trades on her phone at the hall's tea urn.
Witnesses describe a long gasp, then a second, shorter gasp. Then came a sound the hall had not heard since the society began. It was nothing at all.
"Margaret Qualley as Adele. Sabrina Carpenter in it too. I put my foot down for the first time in five years, and I mean that literally." Dolores Brisk, founder, Impatient Foot Society
The rest of the room followed within seconds. One member stood frozen with a heel in the air, unsure whether stopping was allowed. Another kept going, which he later put down to muscle memory and spite.
Reaction beyond the hall was just as heated, by this column's standards. A development executive who asked not to be named, because he was eating a muffin, called the casting news a big moment for the project.
"Five years is nothing in development," he said, brushing crumbs off a script. "I have a submarine picture that's been in development since before submarines. The foot people need perspective."
Variety also covered the casting, though its report made no mention of the society. Pike called that omission "a snub we will be addressing through rhythm."
What happens now
The society now faces a crisis of identity. Its bylaws say members tap until "something happens." Nobody ever defined something.
One faction argues that a casting announcement counts, and the vigil is over. A second insists that casting is not a release date. The film is still untitled, and in their words that is barely a film at all.
"An untitled movie is a rumour with a catering budget," said Pike. "We did not come this far to stop at 'untitled'."
The group has also written to the production offering itself as twenty-six background dancers. The letter notes that members are fully trained, deeply motivated and already in period-appropriate distress. So far it has received no reply.
Brisk says she understands the silence. "They're busy," she said. "Casting takes time. I'd know. I've spent five years listening to it."
The society voted on Tuesday evening. The motion to resume tapping until the premiere passed without a single foot raised against it.
At press time, twenty-six right feet had started up again in perfect unison. Directly below them, the downstairs neighbours had begun forming a group of their own.
