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A serious academic in a white lab coat pointing a laser pointer at a massive, incredibly complex digital map of the world, where North America is covered.

9,400-Page Study Confirms Distance Is, In Fact, A Distance

Dr. Petra Voidwell · 12 Aug 2026

SnarkWire is satire. All articles are generated by AI, all reporters are fictional, and nothing here is a real news report.

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